Tuesday, January 23, 2007

The Ice Master Goeth

Alley Cat is yet another cyclist whose blog is about to appear on my links list, and who left a comment to my last post – which brings me to today’s post:

Not to worry, Alley Cat. We’re not getting an ice storm this year. We can't, now -- it's too late. In the last few days all the buds have popped out, thinking it was spring, and they would all be killed.

The proper time for an ice storm would have been last week, when the snow all started to melt. We could have been frozen into one big ice floe, but it didn’t happen. A few patches appeared here and there -- nothing to warrant the title of ice storm. But for me and a ton of other people it was plenty reason to stay home.

In my opinion, ice is the Divine Excuse for Everything. Ice is a message, and the message is: just Stop it. Stop and think about what you’re doing. Stay where you are. Your plan for the day really wasn’t that important. You were going way too fast anyway, trying to pack too much in. Stay home and do something different.

So what if you had plans across town? As my father used to say at the dinner table if you asked ‘please pass the [whatever]' too many times: “Eat something near you.”

No matter what you do or don’t do, if you can blame it on ice, you’re good in the eyes of the Ice Master.

Same with snow. Portland has about two snow plows. Should we buy more? So that we can be prepared for our one snow day a year? No, we should not. The answer to the snow problem in Portland is that (1) we don’t have a snow problem in Portland, and (2) Portlanders get to have a couple extra holidays.


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