Cyclist attempting to run over own self is attacked by sidewalk

I’ve been practicing my turns lately. Not ordinary turns, but super tight turns. In case I ever want to get a job in the circus. I would think that would be the baseline -- the first thing they’d ask at the interview: how small can you turn on that thing? When I discovered I could make it all the way down the hairpin zig-zag wheelchair ramp over at the Hollywood Max station without touching a foot to the ground, I knew I had talent. So naturally I’ve been developing that as much as possible. Who wouldn't?

Yesterday I was downtown, waiting to cross 9th Avenue on my way to the post office. I approached the intersection from the nice wide sidewalk there, which was free of pedestrians. With so much space I decided rather than come to a complete stop, I would do one of my little spinny-spins. By the time I was back around, it would be time to glide right on across without even having to break my flow.

I have no idea what I did wrong. Maybe I just reached the smallness threshold of my turns. Whatever it was, I hope my body remembers it so this won’t happen next time. The right side of my head hit the sidewalk with such a loud whack that I was sure I’d split my helmet. It’s kind of hard to describe in mere words the force of the impact I felt. Let me just say that if a friend hit me in the head with a frying pan that hard? I would totally end the friendship immediately.

So you get the idea. Hard. I can still feel a sort of smacked sensation on that area of my head today. I’m glad I made it through the night, frankly. Not to seem overly preoccupied, but I had this neighbor, a perfectly strong and fit man in his early sixties, the very picture of health, who slipped on some loose gravel on a slightly inclined path, hit the back of his head, thought it was no big deal, and he died during the night. So if I seem like a hypochondriac it’s because I’ve seen those kinds of stories in real life about people I’ve personally known.

As for the rest of my body, scrapes and bruises on my knee, shoulder, and hip on the right side that hit the sidewalk, and bruises and small cuts along my left shinbone which must have come from my pedal or something. All that from practically a standing still position. Oh well, it’s nice to know that I can sustain a fall without breaking into a million pieces.

But here’s my most important point: No more riding without a helmet just because I’m only going two blocks down a quiet residential street. Now that I’ve discovered I can slaughter myself all on my own without another vehicle in sight, I’m a changed woman. Plus I’m finding another way to dry my hair.