The Queen of Practical

The other day on my way across town I met Marsha. We were riding along one of the bike boulevards at the same speed, so we got to talking. That's the way biking is -- you're not all closed in from other humans, you're right out there.

For those of you not from Portland, bike boulevards are just the smaller streets through residential areas that are not major arterials and therefore are not highly traveled by cars. Cars don't like the stop signs every two blocks, they prefer the big noisy streets with the more infrequently placed stop lights. Certain of these residential streets, quite a number of them actually, have been designated as bike boulevards. Maps have been made showing these streets as having been designated for bikes. You can cross town on these, with minimal contact with the big hairy scary streets. Little arrows topping round discs with bike symbols are painted onto the surfaces of these streets. There are very few cars to contend with.

Anyway I was complimenting Martha on all her weather proof bike clothing, and she said she got it all at a construction supply store. We stopped in the middle of a street and she pulled a couple of other items out of her basket to show me -- most notably an orange construction vest. Much sturdier than most of the flimsy ones I've seen (and bought) at bike shops, and according to Marsha, much, much cheaper. She had protective safety glasses she got there for a dollar thirty nine, as opposed to the 37 dollars you might pay for them if they were labeled bike glasses and sold in a bike shop.

She has a major point there. I'm definitely going to go have a look. The store she named started with an S. I wrote it on my hand, but unfortunately have bathed since, and now I can't read it.

As for safety glasses, I don't need them....... since I am reputed to have emerged from the womb wearing a little pair of lizard specs. Meaning that as a lucky glasses wearer, I don't need yet another pair of glasses to keep debris from flying into my eyes. As for the other supplies, though, I use everything, and I'd love to know of a cheap source.

Next I have to tell you about the use or non-use of safety equipment in Italy.

Promised Thong Photo At Last

OK everybody, I’m back from Seattle! And I have great trip pictures to show you, but not today. Today I have a higher priority: I have the promised thong picture! Yes, here it is, and if you don’t know what I’m talking about, scroll down to Wednesday's posting and read all about it.

Anybody lose a thong?

I took my very first cellphone photo on my way over to my hidey hole this morning! Except I don’t have the little cord that makes it go inside the computer, so I can’t show it to you yet. But anyway here’s my blog posting that goes with it – I’ll try and buy the cord tomorrow and insert the photo here. [X]

This thing’s been lying at the edge of the bike path on the east approach to the Broadway Bridge for at least a week. I think it’s very considerate of people to leave it there, given that the owner might well come back looking for it. On the other hand, why would anyone nab it? Who would want a used thong? Ew.

What I’d like to know is how a person could lose their thong along the side of the road and not even notice.

Although – I’ve heard that wearing a thong is like wearing nothing at all, so maybe if you lose one, you don’t feel any different so you just go along your merry way as if nothing had happened.

And of course the other mystery is, who would wear a thong on a bike?

I don’t know about you, but I’d feel squeamish. I for one would want more than that between my skin and the road.

Anyway, if you see anyone walking around thongless, send them here.

Vesting in our future

OK, here’s the super glow in the dark&light vest of which I spoke yesterday. I forgot to bring the product ID information with me to my hideout today, but when I get back home I’ll fill that in. I bought it at Bike Gallery.

Notice how the back comes down much lower than the front. That’s so when you’re leaning over slightly, as one is wont to do when riding, the thing still shows up. Brilliant. The last vest I had was as short in the back as it was in the front, and it wasn’t nearly as visible from the back because most of it disappeared when you were leaned over.
Also, this one is a snap to take on and off, made easier by having a little belt that buckles in front. That way you can adjust it according to how many layers you’re wearing – instead of trying to wrestle with the “one-size-fits-all” mythology of many products.

I had to pay this model a ton of money to pose for these pictures so I hope you appreciate it and go out and get one of these. I’m not getting paid for this. And why aren’t I, anyway? If the luminescent vest makers want to give me money for blogging about them, I won’t turn it down. But even without the money, my interest in promoting these is completely selfish. As a bicyclist, I don’t want to get hit by a car, and as a driver, I don’t want to hit a bicyclist. So there.

Rain bad, Sun worse – don’t be lulled into complacency

Ok, boys and girls, I know you’re all as happy as clams out there with all this glorious weather. So what do people do? Immediately dump the perpetual load of rain gear -- and with it goes the luminescent rain jacket / windbreaker. Aren’t we all ecstatic to be able to hop on the bike with 50% less junk? Because isn’t that the Number One complaint about biking – that there’s too much STUFF you have to schlep around with you?

HOWEVER – all is not perfect in P-town -- or anywhere else where the sun is shining brightly. What happens (especially in a car) when you pass abruptly from a brightly sunlit area into the dark shade of a row of trees? Ever notice? You’re temporarily struck blind, that’s what. Isn’t it true? For a few seconds you can’t see a durned thing and you’re operating entirely on guesswork. This effect is much less dramatic when you’re on a bike because you’ve got the whole dome in your visual field, filled with an array of light and shadow happening in all the 360 degrees around you, providing for gradual adjustments from light to dark and vice versa. In a car, however, you’re all closed in, making the light more glary and the dark mo darker. And having all that glass reflection to contend with further compounds the problem. Once again the cyclist has the advantage of better vision BUT, ironically, is at the mercy of the impaired vision of the bigger and much heavier Moving Metal Deathtraps.

Conclusion? In sunny times, that luminescent garment is just as crucial as it is in rainy times. That could be the ONLY thing the driver sees once you enter a shadowed area. I have for that reason been enduring my caution-yellow rain shell throughout the sunshine so far. People look at me weirdly, but at least they look at me. Finally I’ve bought myself a simple VEST which is a lot cooler. Later I’ll post a photo and brand information and tell you why I think this one is so much better than the last one I had.

Still crabby after all these months

Hi.

I haven’t forgotten that I’m going to tell you all about what I wear on my head. Today, though, I was too busy with what’s inside my head – which I’m not going to tell you about right now – or in fact, ever. This isn’t the kind of blog in which me, me, me tells all, all, all to you, you, you.(Aren't you glad? Would you not start snoring immediately?)

Today, in addition to riding the usual five miles to my secret hideout, which is in northwest Portland, I also rode another five miles to an appointment I had in southwest Portland, and then another five miles back home. Plus it was freezing the whole day, and rainy. What do I want, a medal? Yes. And not just A medal – I want a daily medal. At least till summer comes, which as we all know doesn’t happen here till the end of June.

These are THE worst days for riding. The. And if you’re out there riding too, we should all get some kind of award. Preferably money – forget the medal idea. We should be getting paid for this. How about every person in a car has to pay a per-trip tariff to someone on a bike? I could live with that. Even with all this rain gear it’s miserable. I recently spent a couple of hours strolling through the Portland Memorial Mausoleum. Eight miles of tomb-lined labyrinthine corridors on six or seven floors. You want cold, go there. But it’s like Hawaii in there compared to what it feels like outside today.

The only way to survive Oregon winters in even a reasonably good mood is to take the middle out of them, i.e., go to a tropical country for a couple of months between November and March. I did that one year, and when I got back the rest of the winter lasted about ten minutes. I’m planning that in for the creaky future that probably awaits me. And I'm taking my bike with me.